By: Penelope Douglas
Genre: Dark, New Adult, Romance
Publisher: Penelope Douglas LLC
Release Date: January 13th, 2020
My Format: Kindle Unlimited
Blurb:
Tiernan de Haas doesn’t care about anything anymore. The only child of a film producer and his starlet wife, she’s grown up with wealth and privilege but not love or guidance. Shipped off to boarding schools from an early age, it was still impossible to escape the loneliness and carve out a life of her own. The shadow of her parents’ fame followed her everywhere.
And when they suddenly pass away, she knows she should be devastated. But has anything really changed? She’s always been alone, hasn’t she?
Jake Van der Berg, her father’s stepbrother and her only living relative, assumes guardianship of Tiernan who is still two months shy of eighteen. Sent to live with him and his two sons, Noah and Kaleb, in the mountains of Colorado, Tiernan soon learns that these men now have a say in what she chooses to care and not care about anymore. As the three of them take her under their wing, teach her to work and survive in the remote woods far away from the rest of the world, she slowly finds her place among them.
And as a part of them.
And she also realizes that lines blur and rules become easy to break when no one else is watching.
One of them has her.
The other one wants her.
But he…
He’s going to keep her.
‘Sometimes the clouds aren’t enough, I guess. We need the whole damn storm.’
I’ve decided 2020 is going to be all about testing my boundaries and my limits where reading is concerned. At the end of 2019 I found myself in a bit of a reading rut, it’s time to experience new things. Much darker things.
I’m going to first start by stating a wide known fact, Credence by Penelope Douglas isn’t a book for those who like sweet vanilla romances. This book, at times, is extremely dark. If you find your stomach turning when reading the basic dark romance, this may not be the best read for you.
‘They lend credence everyday to what happened to me and to my need to be in this. They validated me when I had nothing.’
Penelope Douglas is a fairly new to me author. I read Bully a few years ago and Birthday Girl last year. So I’m not quite up to date on her writing style and what type of author she ventures to be. I don’t know her ins and outs or her approach on twists and turns. Not knowing an author’s writing style when reading a dark romance is a huge gamble. I either win and come out loving the book or I lose and End it extremely unsatisfied and mortified. There usually isn’t room for an in between.
After I finished Credence, I picked myself up off the floor. I sat myself down in my comfy chair. And I thought long and hard about what I just read. There have been only a few romances with dark material that made me feel like I need a serious time out…. and Credence just became a top contender in the short list.
Penelope Douglas sure knows how to write an unpredictable page turner!
There were many moments I loved. And there were a few moments I needed a bit more of. I’m going to do my best with going through those moments in this half. I’m here to warn you, the paragraph below this one consists of slight spoilers. If you want to be slightly spoiled continue reading. If you didn’t come here for spoilers… You should definitely stop reading right now.
‘They lend truth to the fact that I was lost, and it was okay to be hurt.’
I loved the first half of the book (Pre-Sex). I loved the fragile vibes Tiernan through off in the beginning. A wealthy girl from California, a normal person would think she has the world handed to her on a silver platter. But the world couldn’t be more wrong in this situation. You see, Tiernan has lived a neglected life from the moment she was a baby. Her parents were so focused on their relationship and wrapped up with their careers, they never had time to show their daughter what love is. She was invisible to them. I loved how deep Penelope Douglas went with showing reader’s how neglected this child had been. She was a shell of a person with no personality, no feelings, nothing.
When Tiernan’s world is turned upside down, she makes a decision to go to the one person who doesn’t know her truths and can’t see the invisible scars lining her heart. She goes to Colorado and moves in with her father’s estranged step-brother and his two sons.
I have to say, I loved all the outdoorsy moments in the first half of the novel. I loved how Tiernan thought she had something to prove, and she showed Jake and his boys that she’s more than just a bank account and a pretty face. She showed everyone she could also be a hard worker. It was fun watching a city girl, who’s never really worked a day in her life, have to break down and get dirty. From mucking horse stalls, to her first hunting trip, to learning how to cast a fishing pole, I loved it all!
The relationships start to grow and evolve between Tiernan, Jake, Noah, and Kaleb.
Jake is the father and the boss around the farm/mountain.
Noah is the clipped wing adventurer who wants to be free from his father’s clutches and the mountain man lifestyle
Kaleb is the silent one with a dark past and an even darker future.
And that is how I spent the second half of the book, trying to fucking figure out which man Tiernan is going to give her whole heart to and ride off into the sunset with.
“We found each other, and no matter what anyone would say about what happened up here this winter, I’m the only one who needs to understand.’
I wanted more adventure, more time learning new traits, more time for Tiernan to grow and learn more about who she is as a person. I needed more of what I experienced in the first half of the novel to transfer over in the second half. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about these sexy as sin moments between Tiernan and the men in her life, I just needed a little more aside from those moments. It seemed like once she lost that infamous V card, that’s all her mind and the novel revolved around…
Another aspect I had to think hard about was Kaleb. Kaleb is the darkness that this novel revolves around. I have to say, I hated him so damn much, up until the moment I learned his story and the reasoning behind why he was so dark and dangerous. I felt the ice immediately melting around my heart and in that moment and all moments that came before, I hurt for Kaleb. A past has all control when molding a child’s mind and future. Kaleb is trying to protect himself from everything that has any ability to every hurting him, and that is everyone. This man doesn’t know how to trust and he doesn’t know how to express himself, which leads to his moments of lashing out. In the end I found myself feeling for Kaleb. My heart broke for this man time and time again, and saying that I think back to all the shit he put Tiernan through and I feel a cluster of mixed emotions. As I said, violence in any way, shape, or form is NOT okay. But for a person to right their wrongs after violent acts occur are few and far between. I loved how he changed his ways. All it took was one wrong move that forced his step in the right direction.
Alright, this is beyond the longest review I’ve written in a long time. I think it expands the definition of review and more travels along the lines of rambling. When I’m passionate about a novel I write what I feel. With that being said, Credence was a novel I found myself very passionate about. I went into this one not knowing anything about the storyline or what the content entails. I had my fair share of What The Fuck moments and I had moments of complete understanding. What I loved most is the fact that Penelope Douglas wrote a character I completely detested in the first half of the novel and by the last quarter I found myself loving and hurting for a character who I was least emotional about. I was Team Noah throughout this whole damn book…. and out of the blue my brain betrayed me and flipped a switch.. What the hell is that even about?
Should you read Credence?
If you are sensitive to triggers that revolve around violence I’m going to have to tell you to pass on this one. There are a few unsettling moments that had even me cringing and I’m not prone to triggers.
If you are sensitive to triggers but love dark romances, all I can say is go in with your eyes open and expecting the unexpected.
If you aren’t sensitive to triggers and absolutely love dark reads, what are you waiting for!?
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(Free with Kindle Unlimited)
Amazon US: https://amzn.to/2u31ZMw
Amazon Worldwide: http://viewbook.at/CredencePD
Paperback: https://amzn.to/2TnGd0M
Peace Love and Happy Reading,
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Hmm… I’m still not sure I want to read this one…